Be the inspiration for kids, not their lesson.

Parents' reactions can sometimes be a kid’s worst nightmare. Does it sound unbelievable? Yes, it does, but it is a topic of discussion that we have never had. We have had conversations where we talked about how parents can be an inspiration for their kids or how they can help their kids to be successful in life. Nevertheless, we sometimes overlook that parents inadvertently also can be a trial.

There are instances where kids have reported that the scores affect their parents more than it does them and they are scared of their reactions. It shows how parents’ expectations can be the worst nightmare for a kid. As a parent, it is not wrong to have expectations but understanding there is a thin line between expectations and pressure is also important.

Though unintentionally, parents put children into a dilemma and an unrealistic situation of being the best and that if they don't land up to the expectations, they have no future ahead. This put children under unimaginable pressure and race to prove themselves to their parents rather than learn something and be happy in life. This is more toxic than we think it to be. The only purpose of such an approach is to have a successful career and not a happy life.

However, if parents focus on inspiring their kids to be happy and to do what they like and yet teach them the lessons of having a strong future ahead is more important than just pressuring them to score well and be in a certain type of profession.

Parents also sometimes intentionally create situations for the children which they think are beneficial but in reality, are toxic. For instance, the continuous comparison among the siblings instills jealousy and affects the sibling love that kids need to have among themselves. Secondly, showing kids that they deserve rewards only when they perform well in their tests and not when they behave well or are good to other people is another way to show that nothing else is more important. The list can differ based on what harms a child’s mental health. However, as adults and most importantly as parents, we need to keep a check on our behavior and our words so that we can be the inspiration for our kids and not their lesson.